Abundant life, Encouragement, faith, Fear, forgiveness, Leadership, marriage enrichment, Parenthood, Salvation

Fire Out Of Control

resentment is the cocaine of emotions.....
Resentment is the cocaine of the emotions.  It causes our blood to pump and our energy level to rise.  Like cocaine, it demands increasingly large and more frequent dosages.

There is dangerous point at which anger ceases to be an emotion and becomes a driving force.  A person bent on revenge moves unknowingly further and further away from being able to forgive, for to be without the anger is to be without a source of energy.

Hatred is the rabid dog that turns on its owner.

 

Hatred is the rabid dog that turns on its owner.

Revenge is the raging fire that consumes the arsonist.

Revenge is the raging fire that consumes the arsonist.

 

bitterness is the trap that snares the hunterBitterness is the trap that snares the hunter.

Mercy is the choice that can set them all free.

From the “The Applause of Heaven”

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Abundant life, Encouragement, faith, Fear, Love and Life of a Testimony

Puke or Post on Facebook

life problems on facebookIt’s very easy to post our frustrations or even our thoughts on Facebook.  Although I have done it time to time to voice my opinion I try not do this to the negative destructive way inserting ill feeling toward someone or my own negative feelings or behavior to where it affects someone or points back to me and being emotionally unstable and unable to handle life’s problems.  Although I think writing your thoughts, feelings and all are great and therapeutic down on paper in journaling, I don’t believe it is always helpful on social media when it becomes an ongoing thing.  Yes, I know we all have freedom of speech but should not we control our fingers since they are our tongue?  Research shows it is helpful to voice our feelings on social media but again I think there should be rules of engagement.

We must remember our kids, our neighbors are more apt to view online comments than we adults. Suggesting or advocating in any way a potentially harmful action is out of line and swear words or threat to someone or self is unacceptable.

Research shows certain online behaviors may be beneficial for some because they provide an emotional outlet, boosting short-term well-being.

Individuals who score low on emotional stability  experience emotions more intensely  and negatively and are less adept at regulating their emotions on their own. Although this leaves them with a heightened need to share their emotions with others, their low affiliation and their tendency to be socially apprehensive might make it difficult for low emotionally stable individuals to share emotions with others offline. The online setting, however, makes sharing less threatening. It is believed that online sharing can have beneficial consequences. It may help emotionally unstable individuals boost well-being after negative emotional experiences by increasing perceived social support. Research suggests that the verbalization of an emotion can encourage healing over time and social sharing of emotion provide immediate benefits other than just journaling to oneself.

By releasing emotions on Facebook or other social media, it will buffer negative feelings that arise from negative emotional experiences, providing immediate relief. In other words, it may immediately boost overall well-being (e.g. by reducing feelings of anxiety or loneliness) and prevent outrages at home or work.

So now I understand the reason why some people just post post post puke all the time = low emotional stability in need of social acceptance and self acceptance.

As a counselor I understand. 🙂

As a minister of the gospel there is help and helping others should also be first in our minds.  Of course when you are sick, you don’t really think about where you are going to puke.  It just comes up and out.  As adults we run to the bathroom for the toilet but as children you puke where ever you are standing.

My question, “Who and what effect does the negative emotion have on yourself or on others when you post”?  Do people really think about the posting?  Why do people want to argue when they see a post voicing an opposing opinion?  It seems as tho some people want people to argue with them.  Does this mean they love confrontation or they really don’t think about the effect it has on others reading their posts?

Many questions, many unanswered questions.

Here are my suggestions when posting:

1.  Do not propose debatable topics unless you want others to argue with you.  Arguments will make tempers rise and you could possibly get hate messages, so if you have low self-esteem or if you have problems with your blood pressure, be aware of topics that could cause debates. Do you want to be known as the person who likes to start debates?  I know some.

2.  Don’t puke out your negative feelings about how bad, crazy, depressed, lonely, unworthy, etc you are because this is direct opposite of who God is and has for you.  This is negative faith = fear.  God lives on each and every one of us, therefore He is stronger than the feelings we are having at that particular moment.   Although you may feel upset, post the opposite so the enemy will leave you alone.  You will be speaking faith and proclaiming your prophecy for your future.  Negative post attract negative people, the enemy and fear of the future, opposite of what your soul really desires.  If you want friends to stick around and like you, then don’t puke.  People want to be friends with positive people.

3.  Don’t be emotional abusive: the golden rule is to do to others what you want them to do to you.  So be careful how you respond to other people’s post.

4.  Don’t air out family or friends life’s problems or gossip.

5.  Don’t call out sin or what you think is sin as well as judgement.  You don’t really know what the other person is thinking or doing unless you talk to them directly or live out in their shoes.  No one is perfect, so let the person without sin cast the first stone.  I know of a particular person who constantly makes post about other people’s problems or issues, yet claims to be a Christian.  How can we win someone to Christ by being judgmental or acting as though we are sinless.

In conclusion, as the body of Christ, we have a very important tool called Social Media.  We are to win the lost, and be an example to others as well as building up the Body of Christ, teaching, expounding the Word, encouraging others, and being the light to draw people out of darkness.

What is your thoughts?  Do you think posting on Facebook is a positive or negative experience?  Comment below your answers!

 

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Abundant life, Emotional, Encouragement, faith, Leadership, prayer

More Than The Eye Can See

More than the eye... see beyond!Faith is trusting what the eye cannot see

Eyes see the prowling lion.  Faith sees Daniel’s angel.

Eyes see storms. Faith sees Jesus with arms outstretched.

Eyes see the impossible.  Faith sees a God that all things are possible.

Eyes see the wheelchair.  Faith sees the walking.

Eyes see cancer.  Faith sees the stripes that heal us.

Eyes see the sin.  Faith sees the saving grace of forgiveness.

Eyes see your faults and your guilt, coupled with shame.  Faith sees your Savior, His blood and His grace.

Look into the mirror today, look into life and don’t see everyday circumstances.  Faith is beyond what your eyes behold!

Abundant life, Emotional, Encouragement, faith, forgiveness, Leadership, Love and Life of a Testimony, marriage enrichment, Patience, prayer, Salvation

Nugget Soup

my nugget soup of LoveI like to walk away with nuggets when I go to a conference, listen to a sermon or hear a teaching series.  You can get nuggets from a good book too.  Lots of nuggets form a soup in which you can take and give to someone.  I recently came across something in which made me really think about how we may treat others due to the way we treat ourselves which made me think.

I also had a friend who told me how she watch me love on someone after they made a life mistake, instead of me turning my back on them, I showed love and encouragement, accepting them instead of shunning. It is a shame that Christians can take on the same format of the blame game or they get what they deserve the attitude.  Let me explain.  When we truly want to see the real person inside, and truly want to love as Jesus loved, we will look past the mistake, the unmet expectation and seek restoration in the relationship.

To punish others some people withdraw love, affection and encouragement when the very people they love don’t meet up to standards, accomplish what they want or do what they wanted even when sin is not even the culprit.  Why?  Because it is believed that those who fail to meet our expectations are unworthy of love and that result or failure from sin must be punished.  Sometimes we even put a date or time of how long they should be punished determined in our own minds or how much we feel hurt.  Making others feel bad about their decisions is a way of punishing, manipulating and controlling.  This is a performance or works righteousness behavior.  This seed is sown to produce a sense of when I am hurt, I will hurt until I feel better about what they did to me, therefore I will continue to put condemnation on them. It even goes to the point of sowing discord to everyone who knows them.

When we look at others and are quickly to point out their faults or expectations we have of them,  it produces a self-righteous within our own heart, therefore giving us the right to quickly punish the other person at any time they fail or don’t meet our expectation.  I have seen families torn apart because of this even when sin is not even involved.  Sad but true this also happens in churches.  People see old friends out in town and they won’t even speak to them.  They still hurt therefore they continue to hurt others in this way.

We should not feel good about the sin committed if there was one, because dishonoring God and bring harm to others produce sorrows.  When a sin is found out, repentance should take place and the parties involved need to work in forgiveness and in love in restoring peace.  If a person believes himself or herself to be the stronger Christian, the attitude should not be anger and condemnation, for if this is the attitude displayed, then the ones who have failed will try to avoid those who punish them.  This is why most people have been deceived about God’s character.  They fear God and run away from God because He is going to punish instead of love.  Discipline yes but rooted in love.

The goal in what I am trying to convey today is, that the goal of discipline is to restore, develop and perfect.  Punishment on the other hand is retaliation and used to impose a penalty which Christ has already paid the price.  God’s discipline can be severe but it is prompted by grief not anger.

So how do we know if we fall into these category of self-righteous religious works mentality?

Ask yourself:

When someone I love makes a mistake or doesn’t live up to my expectations, do I……

a.  withdraw love and affection from them as if it is a form of punishment

b. hurt them in ways of talk, action or just plain ignoring them

c.  point out other faults to make them feel bad

d. condemn or scorn them for their actions or decisions even when there is no sin involved

e.  impose a curse or threat upon them of future tense (example: If you do this, then you will be sorry you did it, you will suffer….etc…)

f. when you are around them, you still feel hurt, agitated or feel as though you need to be in control of their life in making their decisions

If we answer yes to any of these questions, even maybe due to opinion, what right do we have to call ourselves Christ like?  We should love, show  forgiveness and other fruit of the Spirit when hurt, when people don’t live up to our expectations and yes even when they sin.  Christ paid for it all, so lets stop condemning not only others but also ourselves and run to God whether if you are on the receiving end or the giving end.

Do you know we can also do this to ourselves?  We can condemn ourselves and feel as though we must be punished.  This is another soup I will save for another time.

That is my nugget soup for the day.

Abundant life, Encouragement, faith, Love and Life of a Testimony

There is NOTHING

romans 8Sometimes when we show our own little pity party and listen to the lies of our enemy “God doesn’t love you  or He wouldn’t have let this happen to you”.  We believe God doesn’t love us.  I mean how could He love us when this or that has happened… we listen to the thoughts, however it is when we stand on the Word that results in overcoming faith and puts out the lies.  God actually let this happen to us to make us strong, to make us depend upon Him, to strengthen our walk with Him to help others.  It is all a part of His plan for our lives.  We don’t base our lives on powerful feelings or emotions in which we feel at any given time but trust God with His Word.

My thoughts are centered around the last part of Romans 8.  If God is on our side, who can ever be against us?  Since he did not spare even his own Son for us but gave him up for us all…Who then will condemn us?  Will Christ? No!  He is the one who died for us and came back to life again for us!…  Who can ever keep Christ’s love from us?  When we have troubles or trials, or when people turn against us, is it because he doesn’t love us anymore? No! If we are hungry or broke, in danger or threatened with death, has God deserted us?  No!  Victory is ours because through Christ who loved us enough to die for us.  Nothing can separate us from the love God has for us!  NOTHING! Death cannot, life cannot, angels can’t and all the power of hell itself cannot keep God’s love away.  Our fears for today, our worries for tomorrow, where we are at the moment, there is nothing that will ever be able to separate us from the love of God demonstrated by our Lord Jesus Christ when he died for us.

You see God loves!  He loves you, He loves me and nothing…. NOTHING…. will ever be able to separate His love from us.  He is not mad or angry at us, He loves us.  His love goes beyond what we can comprehend.  Regardless of what the enemy throws our way, we must filter it through the Spirit, look to the Word to determine truth and stand through the circumstance regardless of what we are feeling or hearing the enemy say.

When you are feeling down or trying to determine IF God truly loves you… remember His Word… there is NOTHING that can separate you from His love, now that is strong love.  That is the kind of love that cast out all fear.  That is the love that is pure.  That is the love that shows forgiveness.  That is the love we all should show, have and have overflowing in our lives. 🙂

Abundant life, Educational and Informative, Encouragement, faith, forgiveness

Changing Victim Mindset

In one of the classes I offer, we are talking about our thought process and how it creates mindsets.  I have come to realize there is a clear distinct difference in having a victim mentality.  It starts with the way you think with negative self talk.  It is believing false assumptions and grasping a victim mindset. Most people don’t know they have a victim mindset however those around them eventually see the true picture by the reactions they take.  The victim surrenders power over their life to others because their life is driven by their environment and are they are often bound by unforgiveness. Victims tend to see the control and responsibility for their situation as belonging to others and blame the bad things that happened to them on someone else.  In other words, “I suffer today because of someone else.”

In counseling I often tell others life can knock us down at times, but the past or current situations cannot control who we are or what holds for our future.   Our past doesn’t control or determine our future nor does our environment control us, only we can determine our future by taking responsibility for our own actions and thoughts today. This is what I try to convey to those who have a victim mindset and give them exercises on how to change.

I remember times where I had faulty thinking and I believed others were always trying to make me mad until I had Jeff to remind me that wasn’t true.  I don’t know where it came from and I don’t know why I thought that.  It started with an argument between me and him and I automatically owned the untrue thoughts that everyone was out to try to just aggravate me or come against me, not intentional of course but it seemed everyone in my life at the time was making me irritated. That is when I realized I was being controlled by how I reacted to my environment and not by the truth.  I realized I had to take my thoughts captive to Christ and what His word said about me and my life instead of believing that others were out to “get me”.  Call me silly but it seems when you get in that type of mindset, everything is just “bad” or negative thus creating a snow ball effect of bad thoughts, decisions and words spoken leading to situations that seem to get out of control.  It puts you into fight mode, justification for your actions mode and throw a fit mode to tell the world the wrong that has been done to you.  I am thankful I had a husband who put a stop to this before it got out of control because I couldn’t have imagined going through this mental torment longer than a day.

When something happens in life causing stress or pain, a person with a victim mindset usually blames someone else for their suffering without taking responsibility for their actions in the dramatic situation.  (“This happened to me because of you!” statement example or “You made me angry!”) This person usually has low a self-esteem, intimacy issues and becomes angry as they have a feeling of helplessness.  It is though the truth or other choices are simply invisible. The victim feels their life is just a roller coaster of bad circumstances one right after another.  They may even feel as though it is fate or that they are being punished.  With this type of mindset a person feels important when they make an issue by blaming others to get attention while portraying a feeling of helplessness thus creating “I am the victim here”.  This in turn satisfies the ego to make others think you are helpless in the given situation. They usually like to tell others their side of the story in order to make others feel sorry for their circumstances and help them through the situation.  This mindset affects the mood, behavior and happiness not only in themselves but also others around them.  More likely others will not continue to help them for it seems it is one continuing saga since their situation continues in one form or another.  My father-in-law always said, “You can’t continue to help someone if they don’t help themselves”.  Victims focus on what they cannot control therefore their circle of influence shrinks, in other words, no one wants to be around them after a period of time fearing they are always asking for help or leaving a negative influence behind.  It also focuses on the negative aspects of life therefore decisions made will be based on wrong assumptions.  Thus creating more bad decisions which lead to more pain and failure which encourages this victim mindset to continue. This is why it seems that life continues to shell out bad things.  We have learned that thoughts lead to actions, actions lead to habits, habits lead to character and character leads to destiny.  It all starts with a thought.  We are here today because of the thoughts we had yesterday or the day before.  Therefore it starts with thoughts and we need to change ‘our mind’.

Victims can feel they have certain rights that the world owes them, and are disappointed or angry when the world doesn’t deliver. They tend to feel very strongly about “their rights” and they way things should be done for them. The focus is “what can I get?” from this situation.  What people don’t realize they can emerge as victor or victim and their actions prove what mindset controls them.  We cannot always control what happens to us but we can control how to react to it.

How can we help others or ourselves in this mindset?  We must first realize how to control our own negative self talk.  We all must learn to shut down negative opinions from others.  We also must learn the skills to overcome our thought process.  Instead of taking pity we can learn to rise above events and refuse to allow others to rule our life by being proactive instead of reactive. Proactive people focus on the things they can control.  The most effective way to overcome the victim mentality is to start taking responsibility for every action and circumstance in life instead of blaming others for current circumstance.  Proactive people’s lives are driven by the values they employ in how they choose to respond.  When something happens we must ask ourselves what we did wrong in the given situation so we will learn wisdom not to repeat it.  If we don’t learn, guess what happens, life continues to shell out the “bad circumstances” cause we haven’t corrected the victim mindset, therefore we continue to blame others for where we are in life.   We must release others for their failings to meet our expectations and accept responsibility for our own actions.  We first must start thinking positive and believe people are not out to get us or out to make us miserable or out to sabotage our happiness.  We must replace negativity with positive thinking.

As the Word tells us, “renew our mind daily”. When we learn the wisdom we will stop blaming others on our current environment or past situations.  Jesus never blamed others or wanted to tell others his side of the story to make others feel sorry for him but instead prayed for them and died for them.

 

 

Prayer:  Lord help me change my thoughts into Your thoughts when I fall into the victim mindset.  Help me to recognize the truth instead of lies.  Help me to remember You are always in control even when I am not.  Help to be proactive and not reactive to my environment or current situation and to think positive.  Help me to own my responsibilities and not blame others for how I am feeling or what I am going through at the present time.  Help me to pray for others instead of wanting to take revenge on others because of my circumstances.  Help me to forgive others, love others and reach out to others.  In Jesus Name.  Amen.

Ephesians 4:23 23and that you be renewed in the spirit of your mind, 24and put on the new self, which in the likeness of God has been created in righteousness and holiness of the truth.

Abundant life, forgiveness, Leadership

Warning of an Infectionious Parasite

Do you know about this little bug?  We must be careful because at one time or another in our life it tries to make us it’s host.  It will continue to feed and infect with its poison until we decide to rid ourselves with the ancient old remedy.  This parasite spreads quickly and takes on as many hosts as it can find.  It can last for a few hours or a years.  It can be hatched from pain.

Life has many twists and turns and working in the counseling business I hear damaging and hurtful stories repeating the same thing over and over.  Whether it was during childhood, during marriage or a trusted friend there is something they all have in common.  It is hurt and it is unforgiveness.  Both these two play an important part in every situation and in every circumstance. Unforgiveness is a parasite and it feeds on the anger and hurt of hits host, finding its most satisfying nourishment in human pain.  It thrives on the cycle of replayed scenes recalled anguish and rehashed justification for holding fast to grudges.  Essentially, unforgiveness grows plump on desire for revenge. There is an old saying, “We are most like beast when we kill, we are most like men when we judge and we are most like God when we forgive.”

Extending grace is something we must ask ourselves if it is worth it, and the answer is yes.  Forgiveness is a choice.  It is a decision to hand the scalpel to God and allow Him to remove the tumor of offense from the heart.  No one deserves forgiveness but it is something we must give if we want to live a life of peace.  Forgiving is not easy especially to those who have hurt or abused us but if we truly want to be free we must.

Who do you think is pushing that rewind button on the movie screen of your mind?  It is the enemy who wants to keep us bound to past hurts.  If we choose to forgive, God turns our pain into purpose, our hope and our misery into ministry.

If we could only see what this parasite does to us then we might decide to learn to let things go.  It infects your mind, your love, your emotions and your decision-making in using wisdom.  Smashing this bug is not so easy sometime and it isn’t just a feeling. The meaning of forgiveness is “to let go from one’s power, possession, to let go free, let escape.  Unforgiveness is the means by which we securely bind ourselves to that which we hate the most.  It is putting the past behind completely and moving forward by forgiving quickly and completely.  Forgiveness is not a sign of weakness but a sign of strength.

Forgiveness is letting go of your need for revenge, it is cutting the person loose, refusing to let bitterness and hatred rule your life and leaving the past behind by not allowing it to control your actions or emotions.

What is the remedy?We shouldn’t govern our actions with feeling but with the Word of God.
New Living Translation (©2007) Luke 6:37-38
“Do not judge others, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn others, or it will all come back against you. Forgive others, and you will be forgiven. Give, and you will receive. Your gift will return to you in full–pressed down, shaken together to make room for more, running over, and poured into your lap. The amount you give will determine the amount you get back.”  While listening to a successful pastor from Texas, he stated that many times we do not understand verse 38.  He says it doesn’t have to do with money giving but judging, condemning  and forgiving.  He stated that if a person continues to judge, condemn or promote unforgiveness it will be given back to him even the more so plus some.

Here are a few steps in which will help you clean out the house of unforgiveness.

1.  Write down the name of the person who hurt you. (rape, verbal abuse, sexual abuse, neglect, betrayal, desertion, rejection, etc)

2.  Write down how you feel about that person.

3.  Decide to forgive.  God has given you power to forgive but it begins with a will to forgive.

4.  Take your list to God and confess your forgiveness to Him.  Say, “I forgive ________ for __________.  At this moment I choose not to hold offense against them but put them in your hands.  I pray that you will heal my emotional wounds and help me be able to help someone else with te same comfort you have given me.  I cut ________loose. ”

5.  As a visual exercise, destroy the list.

Abundant life, Love and Life of a Testimony, Weird Stuff

The Rooster Has Horns

This past holiday, my family and I spent a few days in Gatlinburg Tennessee.  While in a mexican restaurant I saw a stuffed rooster on the wall.  However this rooster had strange horns coming out of its head.  I said something really stupid.  “Jeff is that rooster a mexican rooster?”  He looked at me with such a confused and smiling face, “You are really asking me this question and are you serious?”  Then we burst out laughing together.  Although I didn’t think that a rooster could grow horns I said it without truly thinking.  I actually thought that this particular rooster was a Mexican rooster cause it had horns and it WAS in a Mexican Restaurant.

This made me think about Peter and the rooster story.  He denied Christ three times before the rooster crowed.  He actually said something without thinking in which caused a great turmoil in his spirit.  I believe this was the point of his true conversion.

As we start off the new year, let us think about the words we say.  Let us speak as Christ spoke.  Let us not deny who God created us to be.  Love Jesus, speak love and do as Jesus would do.

The next time you see a rooster with antlers….just don’t believe it but smile cause someone is being creative!

Happy New Year!

John 13:38 New International Version (©1984)
Then Jesus answered, “Will you really lay down your life for me? I tell you the truth, before the rooster crows, you will disown me three times!

Abundant life, Emotional, Encouragement, Weird Stuff

Struggling From Sin

Yesterday I was a real grouch.  It was like negative energy was trying to force its way into my brain and my life.  I know at times my attitude and wanting what I want can really kick in and the sorry thing about it is that I know that I am being difficult.  For instance, we decided to go to this conference in Louisiana which was a nine-hour trip.  My husband suggested that we take his mother.  OK with me, however he decided to take her car and not our Land Rover truck.  Both has the same amount of space but I don’t necessarily like riding in the back unless I can sit in the middle and look out.  She has no middle seat in her car and it doesn’t ride as smooth (at times I felt like I was on a roller coaster).  This was the first of many irritations.  The second was that I forgot my iPod, therefore I was forced to listen to nothing except them talk and I was again out of my daily routine.  We drove most of the way and spent the night in Mississippi.  Cracker Barrel for breakfast was on the agenda but I didn’t have time to research what I could eat there.  You see, I have been on this calorie count for a week and limit myself to 300 calories a meal.  One biscuit was over 150 calories!  I got frustrated too when I requested the non-smoking section and then they seat you by the smoking section!  Ahhh!  I don’t have a problem with people who want to smoke but you know I cannot stand to be in the same room with cigarette smoke.  Both my parents smoked the entire time I lived with them.  The smoke in the car with the windows rolled up and the smell on my clothes made me hate cigarets.  Now since I can see how it has affected my father struggling with emphysema and gasping to breathe daily, smoking is notorious to me.  Yes, I was being a really big B if you know what I mean.  Being frustrated with the ride, the vehicle, not getting to eat what I want and then placing me in the smoking section I had all I could take.  I got up and left the restaurant, leaving my mother in law and husband sitting at the table ordering their own breakfast.  Call it PMS, call it negative attitude or call it sin.  Yet I was ready to cry cause I couldn’t control the circumstances around me.  I felt like my head was going to explode and I knew I was clinching my teeth and jaw.  Oh, I might add, I forgot my straight iron for my hair and Jeff had left our banner for our table to top off the day.  

I wanted to share this past few days with you because we all have similar days like these.  I am being honest which leads me to our next chapters of Romans.  We are all human and we are born in this world to sin.  I didn’t have to be difficult or have a bad attitude cause if everyone knows me I preach “don’t let your circumstances control you!”  However, I chose to let the outside affect my inside.  Today is much better although working and taking pictures makes me exhausted during these conferences but I enjoy meeting new people and learning to deal with myself and my many mood swings.  As you go throughout today and may find yourself sinking back into the old man and the nature of getting what you want to be thankful for what God has allowed you to experience.  God wants us to be thankful no matter what goes on around us.

Romans 7 14 So the trouble is not with the law, for it is spiritual and good. The trouble is with me, for I am all too human, a slave to sin. 15I don’t really understand myself, for I want to do what is right, but I don’t do it. Instead, I do what I hate. 16But if I know that what I am doing is wrong, this shows that I agree that the law is good. 17So I am not the one doing wrong; it is sin living in me that does it.

18And I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature.d I want to do what is right, but I can’t. 19I want to do what is good, but I don’t. I don’t want to do what is wrong, but I do it anyway. 20But if I do what I don’t want to do, I am not really the one doing wrong; it is sin living in me that does it.

21I have discovered this principle of life—that when I want to do what is right, I inevitably do what is wrong. 22I love God’s law with all my heart. 23But there is another powere within me that is at war with my mind. This power makes me a slave to the sin that is still within me. 24Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin and death? 25Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ our Lord. So you see how it is: In my mind I really want to obey God’s law, but because of my sinful nature I am a slave to sin.

Prayer:  Today Lord I know you are always with me.  Please take care of my hormones today, no hot flashes please and forgive me of my attitude these last few days.  In Jesus name.  Amen. 🙂

Abundant life, Encouragement, Love and Life of a Testimony, marriage enrichment, Parenthood

Never A Bad Hair Day – Part One

Today is a new day for everyone.  I am not a morning person.  My hair is crazy, I have black under my eyes and I wonder around the house with unmatched pajamas.  Even when the sun is shining, I still complain and say, “It hurts my eyes”.  I have astigmatism and the morning light is not so nice on my eyes.  I also have to reach for the cup of coffee and take time to wake up.  I don’t like to talk or look in the mirror.  My husband on the other hand, bounces out of bed, whistling a tune and makes up the bed.  There is a sigh of relief that my husband takes time to help me with acts of service but on the other hand, the whistling and the chipper mood makes my head want to explode sometime.  No, really I am thankful he is so positive, upbeat and excited about the new day.  He usually comes in the kitchen wanting to aggravate us in some form or another and smiling the mischievousness grin.  He has his day mapped out and usually wants to know my plans.  How can I know what I am going to do with my head looking like a tornado?

Every morning we all plan our day or at least sort of know what is going to happen.  We can all look forward to the future or we can look back at the past.  Many times our entire day and how it goes depends on us believing if today is a new day and if it will be a good one or not.  So many times we let outside influences determine the day we are going to have.  If we wake up and have a bad hair day or if something breaks down or if one of the little ones get sick then we automatically think the rest of the day will be horrible too.  What we have to change is the mindset of what we are accustomed to. Just because the morning may have a few bumps doesn’t mean the rest of the day will be bad.  Just because we made a mistake yesterday or in our past doesn’t mean our future will be always reaping what we wish we wouldn’t have done.

Here is a list of things I do to start off the day right. Get enough sleep and if you need help, I know the answer and for me is taking Benadryl.   It is difficult to have a great day when you are tired and edgy. We often under-estimate how much sleep we really require but most of us need about eight hours.  If you have little ones still getting up through the night, a nap is perfect for the early afternoon.  Although I don’t often get to take a nap, sometime my body just craves a quick rest to help me feel better for the evening.  However, when I take those naps it leaves me still awake till almost midnight.   Another tip is to begin your morning with good thoughts. Instead of reviewing your list of “to-dos”, as you get out of bed, try filling your first thoughts of the day with some positive thoughts and remind yourself of five things for which you are grateful, read your devotion and say a prayer.  Don’t forget, you can also read MelissaMonAmie!  Every  morning as soon as I wake up, I tell myself, “Today is going to be a great day, what Lord do you want me to do today?”   I don’t ever want to get out of the bed on the wrong side.   Another tip I try to practice is take a few deep breaths.  Deep breathing helps get the toxins out, give energy and is a form of stress relief.   Start slowly as you fill your lungs with oxygen expand your diaphragm, hold it for a few seconds and breath out.   My husband is always telling me to work out and I know that it is something I should work on but for some of us, me for instance are not so structured or discipline to make it a habit.  However, I have found when I do take time to take a short walk sometime in the morning hours, it is very helpful with gaining my thoughts to positive and again relieve stress.   I do also make it a lifestyle habit of having a healthy breakfast. Breakfast does not have to be elaborate but you will feel better throughout the day if you eat something healthy in the morning. A piece of fruit, some complex carbohydrates such as whole grain, and a little protein (almonds or yogurt), will do the trick!  My favorite is yogurt, or a small bowl of regular oatmeal, fresh blueberries and a little bit of honey.

It takes me a while to wake up and I have found it easier to face the day if I don’t make any major decisions early in the morning before doing all of these things.  If I don’t have a routine, then I get sidetracked.  I can start my day off right, get side tracked and finish the blog up in the afternoon.  That is something I don’t want to get started.  Discipline is a must and I am conquering one at a time.  Give yourself a break from routine.  Some days, I like to stay in my sweats or pajamas and just do nothing except read or watch a movie, however I wouldn’t recommend this on a daily basis but every now and then doesn’t hurt.  As I get older, those days tend to come more often.  My mother has a few words to say about mornings too.  She says to get dressed right away because you never know what is going to happen or who is going to stop by.  For some reason I still don’t listen to positive advice from her and insist on doing it my way.  We all need to learn from our mothers but as daughters and yes the child in us wants to defile wisdom sometimes.

Today is a new day, tomorrow is a new day and the day after that is a new day.  I can determine each day to face it with faith, hope and a positive outlook no matter what my hair tends to do or what others think of me.  I will wake up tomorrow and be happy and thankful for another chance to make a difference in this world.

Prayer:  Lord, I know I am not perfect, just forgiven and set free from a life of worry and sorrow.  I thank you for giving me mercy, grace and your heart to reach others.  In Jesus name.  Amen.

Matthew 6:11  New International Version (©1984)
Give us today our daily bread….