Abundant life, Educational and Informative, Encouragement, Leadership, Love and Life of a Testimony

Battle Tactics Two

When I was in High School, I played basketball.  I wasn’t very good but loved the challenge and the competition especially when it came to playing defense.  Before most games the coach will know a little about the other team players.  He knows the players positions, their weaknesses and also their best ability of talent, in other words, who to watch. The reason behind knowing is to make sure the best guard is on the best shooter.   It is important once you are in the game, you know your opponent and his tactics if you want to win or survive.  That is what I am trying to do in writing yesterday and today.  Know your enemy, know his tactics, know how to overcome in the heat of the battle.  Better yet, know your enemy, submit to God, resist the devil and he will flee.

Yesterday I spoke on how the enemy wants to destroy our faith by attacking us in several different areas of life.  His schemes are simple and very slow in such a way of being in the camp without one even knowing he is in the house.  He first will tempt us to sin by defiling our conscience and getting a foothold in our mind and in our actions.  He will persecute believers by making you feel as though you don’t belong, trip us up by slander in finding any detail that could be twisted into a false accusation, draw us into self-reliance to get things straight with control, get our eyes off Christ and catch us off guard.  In other words, Satan is so sneaky he comes in and sets a plate at the table without you even knowing it.   I explained in detail how he uses different battle tactics to do these things with Battle Tactics One.

Today, I will add to those things his other goals.  How does Satan demoralize us?  The first method is to accuse the saints and intimidate us.  He then will discourage us in any way, form or fashion.  He then turns and redefines the battle.  He wants us to think there is no battle or that he is not in this battle by turning saints away from other believers and the lost.  If he can promote getting our eyes off of the lost world and onto our own selfish nature, he sets back and waits for the sound of each rifle shooting, laughing loudly at the confusement he has set up.  He promotes either isolation or gathering in clicks, tempting other believers to become our opponents.  He makes the battle a fleshly one encouraging us to use our own efforts to achieve spiritual ends.  He has us to battle for power and authority over one another instead of relying on God to take care of the matter or to take action into their own hands.  Prayer becomes obsolete as we let Satan consume our mind, our thoughts, our time and drains one of energy.  Instead of fighting, one is ready to flight because they cannot take the front lines of the battle field any longer.

Once Satan comes into the camp, he sits at the table, he bring division as he dishes out into our plates unresolved anger, unforgiveness, bitterness, envy, pride, selfish ambition, covetousness, murder, arguments, bad judgment, slander, gossip, inflammatory speech, and alienation from leader by sowing seeds of mistrust.  By this time we have eaten and don’t even realize this battle tactic of poison he has given to each family member, spreading like a disease very subtle as it becomes airborne.

As the enemy sits back and waits for the poison to consume our minds and bodies, he continues to spit out the lies, twist the truth and target more of God’s people.  He then follows up with the next step by leading one into error.  He then sits and waits for the consuming of each other as one by one saints continue to get discouraged and drop out of the picture.

The enemy knows the battle far more than we do and he has been doing this for years upon years.  He has false teachers, false teaching and false accusations for shooting down good leaders.  He gains influence over us through occultism, hidden occultism and demonize believers.  His entire goal is to prevent the lost into becoming a Christian by quickly snatching the seeds of the gospel, blind unbelievers, play the game without true conversion or change the church’s agenda.

Satan’s schemes and tactics are complex in his strategic warfare.  We all have fallen prey to his schemes however if one is determined to change his or her behavior and will by turning to Christ in the heat of the battle once they have realized it, then God will consume with love.  Love covers a multitude of sin, casts out all fear and wins every time.

If you have found yourself in the heat of the battle lately, what tactic did the enemy use on you?  Have you recognized it was a plan of the enemy in the first place.  It is not your brother and sister in Christ, it is not the person who doesn’t know God, it is not your husband, wife, children, or any family member.  It is Satan who comes to steal, kill and destroy any way he can and these are his tactics!  Know your enemy so you can stop the plan.  Let love fill you up through finding prayer and intimacy with Christ, in His Word through His messages and through His Spirit.

Isaiah 54:17  No weapon formed against us will prosper or be successful.

Resources for Battle Tactics One & Two:

Genesis 3:1-6, Zechariah 3:1, Job 1, Jude 4,8,10, I Chronicles 21:1, I Samuel 15:23, Numbers 16:11

Matthew 4:1-3,6,12:43,13:4,19,24-39,16:22-23,24:24, 26:51-52, 27:3-5,

Luke 4:2-7, 9-11,22:3-4. 9:62,

John 8:44, 13:2, 14:30,12:5-6, 16:11,

Ephesians 2:2, 4:3,26-31,

I Corinthians 3:4-5,10:12, 3:18-19,

Hebrews 12:1-3,

Colossians 3:8,

2 Corinthians 2:6-11, 4:4, 10:4-5, 11:3-4,14,

I John 2:1, 3:12, 4:3, 5:19,

3 John 9-10,

Acts 5:3,8:18-20,15:19-20, 19:19, 20:28-31, 23:8,26:18,

Romans 8:1,15,33,5:10,

I Timothy 3:6-7,4:1-2,

2 Timothy 2:26, 4:3-4,

2 Thessalonians 2:9-12,

Galatians 3:1, 4:17,

I Peter 5:8-9,

James 3:14-15, 4:1-2

Revelation 2:10,13, 12:10-11,16:14, 19:20,20:7-8

 

 

 

 

Educational and Informative, Leadership, marriage enrichment

Red Flags in Communication Styles

When I taught marriage enrichment classes I always had a sheet called “red flags”.  These were things in your marriage that needed to be worked on or changed if a red flag was visible in your marriage.  Take time today to evaluate your communication with each other.  I will never forget the first time I handed out communication techniques thinking all marriages were on the same communication level in all those who had been married several years however I found out that not every marriage was on the same level.  What I thought were easy questions for each couple to ask one another on their date night, was in fact hard to answer for some because of the present level they were on.  Some walked away actually arguing over the question. In fact there are about five different levels of communication in which I didn’t realize really mattered until I had some couple come back and gave me feedback.

Communication is not just about talking but also body language, in fact I had to break the “dreaded eye roll” once I found out it was a communication red flag.  Today I want to bring out how communication with the thought in mind of how we actually talk to one another when we may seem frustrated.  Once frustration sets in the conversation may go down hill and escalate in to a full-blown out argument.  We must remember that frustration is unmet expectation.  Listed below are some ugly and unhealthy patters of communication.


The Placator
“That’s fine with me.” Or, “Whatever you want is fine.” It’s really not “fine”, but this person does not like arguments, so, on the surface they simply agree, but inside they resent the attitude of the other person. We will never have an authentic relationship until we learn to share our honest thoughts and feelings. You might begin by asking, “Would you really like to know my thoughts?” If they say, “yes”, then share them.


The Blamer
There are many unhealthy patterns of communication, but none as deadly as “The Blamer.” “It’s your fault.” “If it weren’t for you everything would be fine.” “You never do anything right.” “I don’t know how you could be so stupid.” No matter what it is, the blamer will blame their spouse and in the process destroys intimacy and make communication impossible.
An ancient Hebrew proverb says, “A fool does not delight in understanding, but only wants to show off his opinions.” If you are a blamer, I urge you to apologize to the person you so often blame. Your relationship will never improve until you admit your destructive words and seek to understand the other person’s perspective.


The Professor
If you are married and you take pride in being reasonable, and you see your spouse as being unreasonable, you are in the process of destroying your marriage. The person I’m talking about is calm, cool and collected. He believes that if you will listen to his arguments, you will be forced to agree. Any sane person could not disagree.
“Let’s be reasonable,” they say, as they envision themselves as being a person of logic.”Let me explain this to you one more time.” The implication is that if you will just listen, you will understand and thus agree. This person makes no room for emotions. All that matters is logic. But I remind you that God made us emotional creatures and if you don’t allow for emotions, you will never create an intimate marriage. Learn to listen. Treat your spouse as a person of worth. Ask for their opinions and be empathetic with their feelings.


The Statue and/or Subject Changer
This is the person who doesn’t talk. “Ignore her and she will go away” is his philosophy. Such a person will never enjoy authentic relationships. In healthy relationships, people must talk about the things that irritate them.
They must seek to negotiate solutions which will respect their differences. Put your head in the sand, and your problems will get worse.
The key is not to ignore your spouse or change the subject when your spouse brings up a topic that you think will start an argument. Simply ask, “Do you want us to share our ideas and look for a solution? If so, I’m willing to talk. If we are simply going to argue, I don’t have the energy to do that. If we can respect each other’s thoughts I think we can find an answer.” Speak the truth in love and you can solve your problems.

If you see yourself in any of the unhealthy communication patterns above and desire to change, talk with your spouse and develop healthy ways to identify these patterns when they arise. Then, set in place a plan to work towards healthy communication. And healthy communication leads to healthy relationships.

Prayer:  Lord I pray that we will have healthy relationships, healthy marriages and healthy communication in all areas of our lives.  In Jesus name.  Amen.

I Corinthians 13:8 New International Version (©1984)
Love never fails.