Abundant life, marriage enrichment, Parenthood

Five Ways To Kill a Relationship

This morning I will be speaking about relationships and for the month of June we will be talking about relationships, family, children and such.  As I was preparing my lesson I was thinking about how many people I knew and how many close relationships I have.  I have over a hundred phone entries in my cell phone and over one thousand people on my Facebook.  All of these people are people I have met, are friends with but not necessarily close to.  I have a distant relationship but not a hands on, face to face relationship.  Relationship defined is having a connection with others, friendship, family members, or behavior toward others.

Relationships if wanting to be close takes time and work and there is not enough time in this world to spread yourself out over numerous people where you can make a relationship effective.  Some people limit their relationships with only one close friend that last a lifetime.  Others choose to flow with their environment and have many friends throughout life.  Relationship with spouse and children take on a more meaningful role also taking much time and effort.

John 3:16  For God so loved the world that He GAVE his only son……   God gave to the ones he wanted relationships with and what did he give?  Something that in which he valued so much.  Yes, I know we are not God and we can’t always please everyone in our world and with all our relationships.  But can we however give our best to those relationships to the ones we are close to if we are to be Christians.

What affects or hinders our giving in doing what we know what God wants us to do? In anything we do or in the relationships we have?  Here are five ways to block relationship intimacy when it comes to giving something that takes away from us to others.

  1. Selfish – want it my way and don’t want to even try to see it your way or your point of view, don’t care about what you think, your vision for the future of us, shut down emotions, silent treatment, pride.
  2. Twisted perception on facts – your decision is based on unlearned or ungodly facts and not truth – outside influence of point of view from others – man and woman different – can’t mindread or try to get man to think like woman  (First to understand before being understood)
  3. Pride/lust/Enticed – to sin instead of listening to God’s voice – go along with the flow cause it creates a feeling of power.  When you go against a decision made my those in authority over you gives you a sense of empowerment until reality and consequences hit.
  4. Agreeing with sin and to sin –  justify your sin as a right to your actions – Marriage :  I got married to early never got out much – I choose to drink, swear, lie, commit adultery, do drugs and it’s my own business.
  5. Blaming others – he made me do it or she made me do it – anger/unhappiness/circumstances/the past

As Christians we all want to be and grow and be like God.  If we are to be like God then we must give like God.  God gave it all. GIVE!  These five things will keep you from giving to your relationships.  When you find yourself holding back from your spouse, child or friendships usually one of these roadblocks will stop you in the path of effective relationship.

What about your relationship with Jesus?  It takes giving!  Giving of yourself to Him in time, to His work and to help build His kingdom.  It is all about giving.  Are you willing to give?

Scripture Reading for the day:   Romans 10

Prayer:  Lord I pray that I have your heart within me and that is to give.  I want to give to others to create a relationship that can be the best it can be and also God, to give to you in the best way possible.  Thank you Lord for giving Jesus to us so that we may live with you and in you.  In Jesus name.  Amen.

1 thought on “Five Ways To Kill a Relationship”

  1. I really enjoyed reading your Five Ways To Kill a Relationship. A lot of people may not be aware that we must have a personal relationship with God. If we are communing with him, then he will lead and guide us in our daily lives. Staying connecting to God is the essessential ingredient to maintaining healthy relationships with others.

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