As people we all struggle with people who really get on our last nerve. We don’t choose to be around, but they somehow are a part of our lives whether it is our neighbor, worker, or person sitting beside us on the pew. Why should we drain our energy on who leave us nuked with negativity or their self righteous attitudes or chaotic non-christian lifestyle? Self-love people may be the ones who eat up our time and they usually only talk about themselves or expand how much they know. The Word tells us that in the last days, people will be lovers of themselves or self-love. Self-love is when a person does not want to have responsibility for others because it will interfere with their time, space or money. Self-love doesn’t want to cause pain or even work because they always find the easy way out. The definition of self-love is self-seeking, self-absorbed, self-centered, pursuing only one’s ends or interest, or exhibiting concern only with promoting one’s own ends or interests. It is ignoring those people who try to invest in our lives or who get on our nerves.
Self-love is so different from God’s love. If we have God’s love, it is the best interest in others not self. We have a motto in church of saying, “It’s about others” but sometimes we don’t take it to heart. Sometimes we just want a way out, from being around others or from responsibility, work or serving and this is the interest of self and if this is the case we are no better off than the person who gets on our nerves.
Usually we can look around in our lives and point out those people who are self-lovers, but have we ever thought of ourselves a self-lover? Could the person who is in our life who irritates us the most be the very person God has sent to us to bring out that very thing in our own lives to the surface to refine us? Could it be because God put people in our lives to help us learn about His love that He wants us to have and get rid of the self-love in our own life?
How do we resemble the image of the Father? A love that never fails. We must love even those people who continue to love themselves. Only God can love like God because God is love, but it is hard for us to love for we are not God. No matter what challenge comes our way it will never alter the fact that we are people. Love is not just something we feel but is deposited in us as we get closer to Him. Love is a part of God in us. We must have Him, we must have love, we must rely on it not choose to walk away from it and be selfish.
Love can be based on common interest which is how us humans operate, agape is best interest for all. If we don’t have common interest in someone then it is easy to walk away. If the task is something we don’t really want to do, it is easy to walk away. Walking away from people or from task is easy because it is based on self-love. However, agape is God’s love and it is showing interest in others instead of self. Difficult or impossible we must love people through agape love. We must love them on how they need to be loved not how they want to be loved. Loving unhealthy people in the way they want to be loved forms co-dependency and the unhealthy person stays emotionally dependant on human friendship and a false savior. We cannot be Christ to everyone but we however can portray the love of Jesus. He wants us to abound in His love, on purpose which doesn’t come naturally and is not only knowledgeable or blind but loving with insight. Biblical love is opened eyed with a smart heart. God doesn’t want us to be foolish when it comes to love.
Homework for today: Sit down and write out all the things that get on your nerves or upsets you, this could be in the form of certain people or things they do that really irritate you. Now check yourselves and see if it is portrayed in your own life that may be hidden and needs to be uncovered. Once it is uncovered, you can rid yourself of it and God will bless you even the more. Remember self-love is finding a way out instead of pursuing the interest of others.
Self-love must start with identity in knowing who you are in Christ and promote Him not ourselves. We can all say we are Christians trying to promote His Kingdom but when we do it in a way with what suits us the way we want it is not agape love but selfish love. Let us open our hearts today when someone does something to us that we don’t agree with, it could be the very thing we portray to others. Do not choose the easy way out and be selfish but choose to have God fill you up even more. Remember when you make a decision, does it promote self more than it does God and will God get the glory? Is it in the best interest of others or self? Which way can you affect more people in showing God’s love?
Prayer: Lord forgive me for not recognizing what you want to pull out of my spirit and reveal to each one of us your love that is in the interest of others and what is best. Teach us and fill us with your agape love for you are that love and you will never fail. In Jesus Name. Amen.