Since I will be talking about love all week, I hope you practiced your kissing yesterday if you read my blog. I am all about working to improve a marriage and I find myself doing just the opposite of what I preach. My counseling techniques my husband is now picking up on cause he starts his complaints with, “I feel”. You can smile because we all do sometimes without realizing it. Today I want to focus on complimenting our love and the people we come in contact with on a daily basis. We can practice this two ways.
First we can cut out or cut back complaining. We should learn to redirect our words. If you want a peaceful, happy love life, we all need to learn the art of the compliment. Compliments are like magnets and the more you compliment, the more your lover will be attracted to you or the more people will want to be around you. Start noticing things they do, encourage and compliment at least once or twice a day. You may be asking yourself, “Why should I compliment him when he NEVER compliments me?” If you want your marriage or your relationship to grow, it is about giving to water it with kindness and encouragement. Want change for the better? Then it must start with YOU.
Ever heard of a compliment sandwich? It is when you place a difficult situation between two compliments. This works with any relationship. There is also a way you can compliment their intelligence. Instead of barking or complaining about the garage being a mess and that he may need to clean up his tool area, you could say something like this, “I would like your help with something, could you figure out a storage system or a way to organize all the tools?” Suggest to go shopping for a way to organize and do this together. Sometimes a project can seem overwhelming that is why we just would rather leave it and procrastinate how we will do it later. Helping one another is a time to talk and form bonding time, not complaining. We should free our voice from sarcasm and from, ” I am right, you are wrong” attitude. Your words are life or death in any relationship. I have also noticed in the work place if you compliment a fellow employee that no one seems to like, their attitude toward you will change for the better if you compliment them. Some people need to feel loved and showering them with compliments might just be the answer to their love language.
Compliments are a simple, yet powerful, relationship building tool. There are many different reasons to give a compliment. The most compelling – it makes you feel good. You cannot give a sincere compliment without feeling great. It’s impossible. Why does it feel so wonderful to pay a compliment? Because you are connecting honestly, directly, and kindly with another human being. There are also many hidden benefits to giving compliments. It’s amazing that such a small, simple skill like giving away compliments can change the way you view yourself and the world around you. It will strengthen your relationships, boost your self-esteem, and increase your self-confidence. You will experience joy and happiness as you learn to give selflessly.
Each time you give a compliment, you focus completely on the other person. You actively look for positive traits or attributes and specific examples. People’s positive traits jump out at you. Your thought processes shifts from looking for the worst in people to looking for the best. Being proactive spills over into your life. You see the possibilities, not the obstacles. Compliment giving is a jump-start for looking at the world in a positive, refreshing, stimulating, and creative way.
Knowing something is good for you doesn’t always translate into action. I encourage you to make compliment giving a habit – a compliment habit. All you need to do is give away 5 compliments a day. It doesn’t take long to give away five compliments. Five heartfelt, honest to goodness, acts of kindness. It costs nothing but a little time, energy, and the desire to make your life and the lives of others better. Compliments are defined as gracious words, given freely, which create happiness for both the giver and the receiver.
So today is “Compliment Day”! Here are the steps.
1. Decide what you like about the person. 2. Add a detail of why and what you like about them and tell them. It is that easy! Your homework for the day is to give at least five to ten compliments to friends, family and of course your love!
Oh, by the way, you are a terrific blog reader and you are very special in God’s heart! Now, I have nine more to go for the day…. who is counting right?
Prayer: Lord, let my words be sweet honey today for my friends, my family and my husband. Let me see the good and make it a habit to compliment others. I want to spread your love in my life and see others as you see them. In Jesus name. Amen.
Proverbs 16:24, Psalms 119:103 New International Version (©1984)
Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones. How sweet are your words to my taste, sweeter than honey to my mouth!